Welcome to the new year, and in addition to a first check-in on my professional goals or growth or news I also need to focus on my personal feelings today. Last week, I lost a grandparent, for the first time in my life. He was the youngest out of the lot, and an all round happy, smiling, peaceful and friendly person. Everyone in my family is in pain. We are deeply shocked and I think it’s hard to believe that this has happened. So here I am now, sitting down on a Monday afternoon to do some work and my whole mind is refusing to put itself to the task. This is damn difficult. I am unsure what I can share that would be of interest to other people, except that I am once again fighting my own tendency to keep truckin’ and work right through anything that hurts. I feel guilty because I can’t concentrate. I walk downstairs and end up watching a Buffy re-run. I stare at pictures of this wonderful person and the hurt comes right back. Well, what can I say except to share that this is how I am feeling and every day from now is going to be different, but I’m sure it will be fine eventually. Have you experienced anything similar, and found yourself unable to focus as a result of such a bout of grief? Here is a reminder, hopefully as valid for you as it is for me:
It’s okay to focus on recovering without work, to let a few tasks lie and put them to one side, and come back to them when you’re ready. I am reminded of the Hey, It’s Ok… campaign by Glamour magazine. Of course they’re going about it in a light-hearted way, but the magazine has an underlying message in there about anxiety, sadness and feeling inadequate. They bring it out now and then when it’s Mental Health Awareness Week. So here are a few Hey, It’s Ok… thoughts that I need to give to myself today.
- Hey, It’s Ok…to sit at your desk, zone out and stare at the picture of a loved one and admire their smile. That’s more important than work right now.
- Hey, It’s Ok…when you need the third cup of tea and you wish someone else was in the house. Where is that cat!
- Hey, It’s Ok…to cancel an appointment until you are ready to tackle it with your usual verve and power.
- Hey, It’s Ok…if on the other hand working makes you feel better during a tough time.
- And Hey, It’s Ok…to be grateful and sad at the same time. They were awesome – yay. They are gone – not yay.
No matter how you are feeling right now, I hope that these thoughts make sense to you and give you a bit of positivity in your day. It’s okay. No matter what.
And if you’re still with me and curious about the business, why don’t we take a deep breath and go focusing on those goals and processes for a bit!
First of all, I am getting a great sense of what exactly I’m about and how I’m helping out other people as I go along and start working with the first few bunches of them. I am always the kind of person that discovers and learns by just jumping into the process instead of spending a lot of time maturing ideas and getting “ready”. I sort of jump in before I’m pre-ready, and then learn as I go along. This process is certainly messier and it does lead you along a few pretty stupid detours, but I’ve learnt that if “throw it at the wall, see if it sticks” is my style, then I’ll take that.
So in that spirit I have learnt and benefited LOADS from the pilot run of my course, and I’ve also gone ahead and renamed the whole thing. Or maybe not, I’m not quite sure yet but I think now I’ll just run with it. It doesn’t matter what it is called in the end. I am getting rewarding and encouraging messages from my participants who say “thanks, this helped me loads” and that is EXACTLY what I did this for.
My person is feeling discouraged, apprehensive, worried, and my materials and what I do is meant to encourage and sort of help them build some wings if flying is what they’re dreaming of. And most people don’t. Most people only want 2 more clients or perhaps 100 more dollars – come on people. We can TOTALLY do that.